The day Rich passed from earth to heaven, I received from the Lord the direction I was to take: Philippians 3:12-14 Not that I have already attained, or am already perfected, but I press on, that I may lay hold of that for which Christ Jesus has also laid hold of me. Brethren, I do not count myself to have apprehended, but one thing I do, forgetting those things which are behind and reaching forward to those things which are ahead, I press toward the goal for the prize of the upward call of God in Christ Jesus. Press on, reach for what is ahead, for the goal, for the prize of heaven. Rich has already taken up citizenship there (v.20) but I am still here. I am not to get bogged down in the past, but to move forward.
The next day: Isaiah 35:10 The ransomed of the Lord shall return and come to Zion with singing, with everlasting joy on their heads. They shall obtain joy and gladness and sorrow and sighing shall flee away. In the midst of my sorrow, comfort always came when I thought of what Rich was getting to experience!
One Sunday a few weeks later this song spoke to me, bringing tears and encouragement; it seemed to have been written just for me. I Have A Hope: some of the phrases: I have a hope, I have a future, I have a destiny that is yet awaiting me, my life's not over, a new beginning's just begun...
Monday, April 9, 2012
Sunday, March 25, 2012
A Different Measure of Success
Words that I often think of in connection with Rich are: zealous, passionate, man of integrity. Today, successful is added to the list. The sermon which I heard at church was titled Principles of Success, based on Joshua 23: 1-16. The pastor outlined four principles from that chapter of Joshua which characterize being a successful Christian. The first was to give God credit and glory for what He has done. The second: Keep your way according to God's Word and obey it. Third: Cling to the Lord, trust Him. Fourth: Love the Lord your God. All of these principles were consistently applied in Rich's life. He told of God's goodness and greatness, giving Him credit for help, provision and deliverance. Whenever he found anything in the Word that he felt was a command to him, he was quick to obey. Throughout the battle with cancer, he trusted the Lord time and again and clung to Him. And yes, He loved the Lord! He kept himself separate from anything that he thought might compromise his commitment to the Lord. As Chris, our son-in-law, expressed it: Well done, good and faithful servant!
Tuesday, February 7, 2012
Life Goes On--the Journey Continues
Originally, I began writing this blog to chronicle the journey Rich and I were on as he battled cancer. Quickly, though, I saw how difficult it was to do that. When there was hope and expectation, when there were victories, writing was easy. A pattern began to emerge, though, of progress and setbacks; of hope and then despair. What was the use of writing positively, knowing that the next day might bring contradictory circumstances. I only wanted to emphasize the positive. So I stopped. I expected a time would come when the victory would be final and then I could record the ups and downs with triumph. Just now, as I wrote these words a verse came to mind: "Death is swallowed up in victory." 1 Corinthians 15:54 Victory as I foresaw it did not come, but even in death there is victory and triumph, the Word of God tells us. And there's more: "But thanks be to God, who gives us the victory through our Lord Jesus Christ."
Yes, Rich left his body, his body died and he's gone to be with the Lord. I've always struggled with the negative aspects of death--thinking that it is defeat and failure. Now I see that it isn't! For one who believes in redemption through the blood of Jesus, the forgiveness of sins and the provision of an eternal home with the Father and the Lord Jesus Christ, there is no sting in death, only victory! The sting of death is sin; sin is dealt with through the death, burial and resurrection of Jesus. Victory and triumph and rejoicing are appropriate responses! Jesus said: "I am the resurrection and the life,he who believes in me, though he may die, he shall live." HALLELUJAH!
Yes, Rich left his body, his body died and he's gone to be with the Lord. I've always struggled with the negative aspects of death--thinking that it is defeat and failure. Now I see that it isn't! For one who believes in redemption through the blood of Jesus, the forgiveness of sins and the provision of an eternal home with the Father and the Lord Jesus Christ, there is no sting in death, only victory! The sting of death is sin; sin is dealt with through the death, burial and resurrection of Jesus. Victory and triumph and rejoicing are appropriate responses! Jesus said: "I am the resurrection and the life,he who believes in me, though he may die, he shall live." HALLELUJAH!
Sunday, September 20, 2009
A Matter of Trust, A Matter of Control
Recently we experienced some trying times dealing with contractors. We had wanted to do some maintenance work on the house, maintenance which was long overdue, but we ( Rich) didn't have the time to do. In the process of dealing with the contractors, we lost confidence in their integrity and the quality of their work. Mostly this was a result of things promised that weren't done and poor workmanship; some was because of lack of understanding on our part; and I suspect the fact that we weren't in control was also a contributing factor. Their actions and failure to follow through with promises caused us to mistrust them. Our lack of understanding and lack of control added to the frustration.
I read this idea in a book about gardening: People attempting to grow vegetables and fruits get the feeling that nature is an antagonist, so they fight back against insects and weeds with poisons, rather than learning how to work with the natural environment. They have this concept about nature because that is what they experience with people as a whole. When I read that I thought how often people have a similar concept about God--they think that He is against them and taking things away from them, and making life difficult for them. They don't know His goodness and His trustworthiness so they put upon Him characteristics of the people they have encountered who were hateful, untrustworthy and unreliable. Also they want control of their life and when God doesn't come through for them in the way that they want Him to, they doubt His goodness. Again it is a matter of trust and a matter of control. What isn't realized is that God is infinitely good and infinitely wise; He of all beings, can be trusted and allowed to be "in control."
I read this idea in a book about gardening: People attempting to grow vegetables and fruits get the feeling that nature is an antagonist, so they fight back against insects and weeds with poisons, rather than learning how to work with the natural environment. They have this concept about nature because that is what they experience with people as a whole. When I read that I thought how often people have a similar concept about God--they think that He is against them and taking things away from them, and making life difficult for them. They don't know His goodness and His trustworthiness so they put upon Him characteristics of the people they have encountered who were hateful, untrustworthy and unreliable. Also they want control of their life and when God doesn't come through for them in the way that they want Him to, they doubt His goodness. Again it is a matter of trust and a matter of control. What isn't realized is that God is infinitely good and infinitely wise; He of all beings, can be trusted and allowed to be "in control."
Saturday, November 1, 2008
Eye witness account
Yesterday and today I've watched the voting process in action. We live just around the corner from the county election board where early voting started yesterday. Cars filled side streets, our street and a vacant lot nearby after the election board parking lot and the parking lots of two churches were full. What a wonderful thing to see--voters purposefully walking up the street to cast their ballot. Whoever becomes the next president will be chosen by these responsible citizens. Ultimately after all the candidates efforts to persuade and convince, the choice lies with the people. Today they are turning out in large numbers to make that choice!
Sunday, October 26, 2008
The Note
Quite some time ago, Rich left a little note for me that said "I love you" with a smiling face on it. Just for fun, I put it someplace for him to find. That began a routine that has lasted for months. The note often shows up in most unusual places. One time when I was having trouble with the computer Rich suggested I do some troubleshooting and check the bottom of the mouse. There was the note!
Another time, he said I'd find it on Monday. Since Monday was the day that I vacuum, I expected it would be found when I got out the vacuum. But I had to postpone vacuuming, so when he asked if I'd found it, I said, "No, I didn't vacuum"! On Tuesday, I looked everywhere in and around the vacuum and didn't find it. Finally, on Wednesday, the note reappeared--in the mail! He had taken it to the main post office on Saturday morning, expecting a fast delivery.
Another time, he said I'd find it on Monday. Since Monday was the day that I vacuum, I expected it would be found when I got out the vacuum. But I had to postpone vacuuming, so when he asked if I'd found it, I said, "No, I didn't vacuum"! On Tuesday, I looked everywhere in and around the vacuum and didn't find it. Finally, on Wednesday, the note reappeared--in the mail! He had taken it to the main post office on Saturday morning, expecting a fast delivery.
Tuesday, October 30, 2007
cancer log
Today, October 30, another spot has appeared on Rich's neck, on his right side, just behind his ear like the first one 19 years ago. I'm holding fast to the Lord and to His promises, asking Him for healing and deliverance from this plague of cancer. This experience has been a furnace of purification for both of us. Rich is maintaining a cheerful, positive attitude with the expectation of healing being completed. He has been sweet and loving to me all day. Through the times of testing we've grown closer; he has learned to be kind in the midst of pain and feeling poorly; I have learned to be more positive, hopeful and dependent on the Lord--these are just a few of the changes the Lord has wrought in us during this time.
November 3, the spot behind Rich's ear turned out to be just some dried crud that looked like a growth. It is gone. The lesson: things are not what they seem. Today, I still struggled with the sight of his face swelling and being discolored. I ask the Lord for help and He gives it. How do I trust His Word and not go by sight? Which is reality?
November 4 Reading today in Luke, the passages about the storm with Jesus asleep in the boat and the disciples panicking, the woman with the issue of blood, and Jairus' daughter. In all three the natural realities were changed by faith. Jesus spoke to the storm and it ceased, the woman touched Jesus' garment and was healed, Jesus told the crowd the daughter was sleeping, not dead and He changed the reality of death to life. So in these incidents the realities of sight, of what is real in the natural are changed by faith.
November 11 Earlier this week Rich had a season of intense pain in his ear and jaw. Before that occurred, I'd been reminded by the Lord from James 1 to be joyful in times of tribulation for those times strengthen our faith and teach us endurance. That led to thoughts about how the Holy Spirit develops the fruit of the spirit in us--that is is not through a sudden change in me wrought by the Holy Spirit, but rather through a molding, cultivating process as we encounter the various circumstances of life.
November 16 The Lord continues to give scriptures about endurance--James 5: 7-11, Hebrews 12. This morning I was wondering whether He is saying that I need to endure and allow His working in my life and Rich's because healing is not going to come, that He will do a greater work in us through no healing. I saw that I am being doubleminded, I don't know what to believe. Healing, at this point, would be miraculous. I asked the Lord for wisdom so that I am not doubleminded--for Rich says the Lord is healing him. Outward appearances, sight, say otherwise. In my thoughts came the words: He is healed. I asked the Lord for His confirmation in scripture that these words were from Him, knowing that my mind has been active with many thoughts and words that did not have Him as the source. In reply came Isaiah 55:11, which says: So shall My word be which comes forth from My mouth: it shall not return to Me void, but it shall accomplish what I please, and it shall prosper in the thing for which I sent it. Now will I believe?
November 3, the spot behind Rich's ear turned out to be just some dried crud that looked like a growth. It is gone. The lesson: things are not what they seem. Today, I still struggled with the sight of his face swelling and being discolored. I ask the Lord for help and He gives it. How do I trust His Word and not go by sight? Which is reality?
November 4 Reading today in Luke, the passages about the storm with Jesus asleep in the boat and the disciples panicking, the woman with the issue of blood, and Jairus' daughter. In all three the natural realities were changed by faith. Jesus spoke to the storm and it ceased, the woman touched Jesus' garment and was healed, Jesus told the crowd the daughter was sleeping, not dead and He changed the reality of death to life. So in these incidents the realities of sight, of what is real in the natural are changed by faith.
November 11 Earlier this week Rich had a season of intense pain in his ear and jaw. Before that occurred, I'd been reminded by the Lord from James 1 to be joyful in times of tribulation for those times strengthen our faith and teach us endurance. That led to thoughts about how the Holy Spirit develops the fruit of the spirit in us--that is is not through a sudden change in me wrought by the Holy Spirit, but rather through a molding, cultivating process as we encounter the various circumstances of life.
November 16 The Lord continues to give scriptures about endurance--James 5: 7-11, Hebrews 12. This morning I was wondering whether He is saying that I need to endure and allow His working in my life and Rich's because healing is not going to come, that He will do a greater work in us through no healing. I saw that I am being doubleminded, I don't know what to believe. Healing, at this point, would be miraculous. I asked the Lord for wisdom so that I am not doubleminded--for Rich says the Lord is healing him. Outward appearances, sight, say otherwise. In my thoughts came the words: He is healed. I asked the Lord for His confirmation in scripture that these words were from Him, knowing that my mind has been active with many thoughts and words that did not have Him as the source. In reply came Isaiah 55:11, which says: So shall My word be which comes forth from My mouth: it shall not return to Me void, but it shall accomplish what I please, and it shall prosper in the thing for which I sent it. Now will I believe?
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